Truth Before Dishonor

I would rather be right than popular

Archive for March 24th, 2010

I Used To Be A Trucker

Posted by John Hitchcock on 2010/03/24

I spent time as an over-the-road trucker, a shuttle driver and a line-haul driver. Most of the time was spent non-union and just over a year was spent as a Teamster. And here are a few thoughts on that experience.

Yes, Chicago is indeed called “The Windy”. Yes, NYC is indeed called “Dirty Side”. Having spent the vast majority of my time east of I-35, I don’t know if SanFran is called “The Shaky” or not, but I do know there is a line in the sand where truckers switch away from channel 19.

If you have a CB (still the trucker’s outlet to the world) and you think you’re being cool or whatever, don’t ever call anyone “good buddy” despite what the movies tell you. Calling someone “good buddy” on the CB means you’re calling the other person a homosexual. (And that is part of the reason truckers switch channels as they go west.)

Law enforcement does listen to channel 19 (on the west coast, I think it’s channel 17 but I’m not certain). In urban areas, law enforcement does indeed listen to channel 9 (the emergency channel) and will answer when a trucker calls them on it. I used it on several occasions in big cities.

Four-wheelers are the scourge of the highways. They have this strange belief they own the highways, and will do all sorts of stupid things behind, beside, in front of 80,000 pound semis.

Truckers don’t move left to let four-wheelers merge because many four-wheelers won’t clear the area to let the truckers move back right, or if they do, other idiot four-wheelers will keep passing on the right, leaving the truckers stranded in the left lane.

Four-wheelers will shoot around truckers, pull back in front of the trucks, slam on their brakes, to hit the exit ramp they would have hit an entire second later had they waited. Ever get eaten up by a 40-ton vehicle that can’t slow down like you can?

Four-wheelers don’t realize the over-the-road truckers with which they come in contact are in a “foreign” state. As such, four-wheelers don’t allow lane-changes necessary for truckers to get to the unexpected left-turn exit to the highway they need.

Four-wheelers try to pass on the right when a truck is swinging wide to negotiate an in-town right turn, despite the truckers’ blinking right turn signal.

Four-wheelers think they know everything about driving because they drive 15,000 to 20,000 miles a year while truckers drive 12,000 to 16,000 miles a month.

Four-wheelers ram the back of trucks because the four-wheelers can’t judge the speed of the trucks ahead of them.

Four-wheelers don’t understand a fully-loaded truck requires three times the stopping distance as do they. Four-wheelers don’t understand a bob-tail truck (tractor without trailer) requires six times the stopping distance as do they. Driving bob-tail is the most dangerous driving possible.

I drove across the George Washington Bridge in Dirty Side with an empty trailer. I saw the idiot four-wheeler sitting directly beside my trailer tires (the trailer was empty). If you don’t know anything about the GWB, it is one very rough section of highway. The lanes were narrowed because NYC was working on a lane of the bridge. As I was traversing the bridge, the serious bumps caused my trailer to jump left. I don’t know if the idiot driver met my trailer or not, but he definitely figured out to back off and allow me clear passage.

Posted in Real Life, society, Uncategorized | 3 Comments »

A Very Special Pick-Up Order

Posted by John Hitchcock on 2010/03/24

“Thank you for calling __________ , how may I help you?”
“Yes, we’d like to order a hundred grand, hold the dye.”

Posted in crime, humor, society | 1 Comment »

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