Truth Before Dishonor

I would rather be right than popular

I Could Get It Done A Lot Faster If You Would Quit Helping Me

Posted by John Hitchcock on 2009/11/04


I’m sure you’ve experienced it. You are working on a project, such as remodeling your bathroom. You’ve decided on what you want and you’ve gotten all your materials. Then, as you begin, well-meaning people start offering up their free advice (which is worth what you paid for it), hovering around you and trying to get in on the demolition to help you (and knocking out a wall you weren’t going to move).

And when you get to situating the new toilet (and you bought the wrong one, you should have bought the one that uses a capful of water per flush) they help you by turning the toilet the wrong direction. The shower doesn’t have the gadgets you should have gotten and besides, it’s the wrong color and too small. Of course you were wrong in getting a claw-foot deep-water tub when you should have gotten the shallow-water 80-nozzle whirlpool tub. And you’re placing it all wrong.

As you start to install your light bars above your twin vanity (when you should have gotten a single vanity), your helpers install them vertically along the sides of the mirror when you wanted them horizontally above the mirror.

As your supply of pizza and beer vanishes, so do your helpers, to your great relief. And you think, “I could have already had this done if they hadn’t been helping me.”

Government assistance is so wonderful, isn’t it?

2 Responses to “I Could Get It Done A Lot Faster If You Would Quit Helping Me”

  1. […] assistance is so wonderful, isn’t it? _______________________________ Cross Posted on Truth Before Dishonor Category: Culture and Society, Economics, Humor, Political Correctness, Politics […]

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  2. Dustin said

    Why are those stupid bolts backwards on toilets? I just noticed that a few weeks ago, when installing a water saving dual flush, oddly enough.

    It’s true… a lot of people offer help, but not because they want to help so much as they want to be involved in your decisions. The fed doesn’t really want to give money to make Texas’s highways and school libraries, they just want to tell Texans how to manage their roads and schools.

    ‘I can take care of myself’ is the last thing Al Sharpton, Nancy Pelosi, Barack Obama, or your nosy mother in law, want to hear you say.

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