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Abort It? Or Allow It To Live?
Posted by John Hitchcock on 2009/09/09
I remember years ago hearing a “Focus On The Family” broadcast. I actually ordered it on cassette tape. The broadcast had happy-sad stories to tell. And there was plenty of anger, while much was under the surface. And, of course there was plenty of pain.
But what sort of “Focus On The Family” broadcast would have anger and pain? The sort that would have all but the most vile to feel the same anger and pain. This broadcast was a group interview with women who were raped.
That’s not the entire truth. This broadcast was a group interview with women who were raped and became pregnant as a result.
That’s not the entire truth, either. This broadcast was a group interview with the women who were raped and the children they brought forth to the world as a result of the rape.
The women had excruciatingly painful memories of the rapes. But they made an active decision not to murder their innocent unborn children for the rapes. They also made an active decision to love their innocent children, regardless of how they were conceived.
And, at some point in their innocent children’s lives, these women chose to relive their excruciatingly painful experience with their children, whom they loved. And, while the women seemed to have softened a lot in regard to the pain, the children, who were conceived due to rape, had a lot of anger toward the men who violently attacked their mothers in the most heinous of ways.
All the children, of course, were glad their mothers gave birth to them. And all the children acknowledged a deeply-felt love by their mothers and reciprocated it. But, to the best of my recollection, none of the children regarded their mothers’ rapists as their fathers.
These children, all young-adults, or very nearly young-adults, had nothing but praise for their mothers and for what the strength their mothers had to go through everything a woman has to go through when impregnated by a stranger.
Several of the mothers were single parents for years, and had to go through that ostracization. But they never took it out on the children they loved with all their being. How could they? Their children were part of them. And their children never did them any wrong through all of this.
None of the children were thankful the “Y chromosome-owner” impregnated their mother so they could live. Not one. But they were all thankful their mothers chose life over murdering them.
I guess what I’m saying is, if you’re in a terrible situation because some worthless scum-bag violated you, don’t take it out on an innocent. Even if you cannot handle raising a child, you can do the next-best thing. Find an adoption center near you and talk to them. You can have an open adoption, where the adoptive parents give you regular feed-back, or a closed adoption, where nobody knows nobody. But don’t excecute the baby for something some worthless criminal did.
I will never fully understand what you go through on a daily basis. But I do know it’s not worth knowing that you killed your child to (temporarily) ease the pain.
Always know, despite your trauma, that God loves you and will help you through your anguish. You have only to ask. And there are many pro-life organizations out there just waiting for you to reach out to them.
UPDATE:
Foxfier here.
John asked me to share why this hits home to me– a friend of mine is like these kids. Born of rape.
What he reports on the broadcast saying, I can say I’ve seen first-hand, from twenty years down the road– it’s accurate.
I don’t call a lot of folks “friend,” to let you know what kind of person this person is– one of the few folks Elf and I associated with that has no geek traits, just a good person. Not perfect, but a real pleasure to be around.
My friend’s mother is very religious, so she never considered abortion, and even married a man my friend now considers “dad” and “father”– the sperm donor is less than nothing.
Please. If some scum has hurt you, don’t hurt the kid– they are as much a victim as you are, and that baby can grow into a wonderful, funny, caring, delightful person, if you’ll give them that chance.
9 Responses to “Abort It? Or Allow It To Live?”
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Truth Before Dishonor 
Foxfier said
Linked.
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John Hichcock said
Foxfier, if you are willing, please add your own addendum to the bottom of my article. What you have to say on the subject hits closer to home than what I had to say.
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foxfier said
I’ll see if I can figure out how.
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John Hichcock said
I changed you from “author” to “editor” so that should help, I think.
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Common Sense Political Thought » Blog Archive » Abort It? Or Allow It To Live? said
[…] person, if you’ll give them that chance. ________________________________ Cross Posted at Truth Before Dishonor Category: Crime and Punishment, Culture and Society, Political Correctness, Politics, Pro-Life […]
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blubonnet said
How fair is it to bring a child into the world, when the potential child will be in an unstable environment, or if a pregnancy is completed, and the woman who carried that fetus, into being an infant within her, has to give up that tiny human, of which is of her own blood, the pain could not be imagined by any of us that have never had to endure it giving away your baby.
“The fact that the consciousness of a fetus is not even in existence before the 28th week, sometimes, it is a more humane thing to end the pregnancy prior. Here is a piece I took from an article on fetal development below. Incidentally, I do not believe that after the 28th week, an abortion should be allowed, unless the circumstances, medically, life of the mother in jeapordy, or maybe the mother has cancer and had chemo, which would have unfairly affected the fetus, causing an unspeakable tragedy of deformation to the potential child. So, consider that all is not cut and dry, two dimensional, good and bad.
“With Roe v. Wade, the U.S. Supreme Court gave states the right to legislate abortion restrictions during a woman’s second trimester. Many states enacted laws that make it more difficult to terminate a pregnancy. Among them, Arkansas, Minnesota, and Georgia require physicians to tell women that 20-week-old fetuses can feel pain during the procedure unless they are anesthetized. A newly released review of the scientific evidence, however, suggests the premise of those laws is wrong.
Fetuses cannot feel pain until at least the 28th week of gestation because they haven’t formed the necessary nerve pathways, says Mark Rosen, an obstetrical anesthesiologist at the University of California at San Francisco. He and his colleagues determined that until the third trimester, “the wiring at the point where you feel pain, such as the skin, doesn’t reach the emotional part where you feel pain, in the brain.” Although fetuses start forming pain receptors eight weeks into development, the thalamus, the part of the brain that routes information to other areas, doesn’t form for 20 more weeks. Without the thalamus, Rosen says, no information can reach the cortex for processing”
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John Hichcock said
I understand you are Pro Choice. I am Pro Life. Hopefully we can be cordial enough to call each other by our prescribed “groupname” choices. I doubt anything I say will change your mind regarding your stance. And I know nothing you say will ever change my mind. But, let’s, for the sake of debate, set up “what if” or three.
You talk about the development of the unborn child (allow me that term on my site?) but not about the humanity. I have heard the argument that the unborn child is not an individual human until it’s born. Given that definition, how born is born? Is the entire body being outside the mother with exception of the baby’s head born? or unborn?
What happens if scientists decide without a reasonable doubt that the union of an egg and a sperm immediately results in a human, unique from the mother? Would that provide Constitutional rights to that child? (Again, this is a “what if” and not a personal contract.)
I have heard much anecdotal evidence saying all but the most psychotic of women who have had abortions suffer from post-abortion syndrome, where they feel great psychological pain from being responsible for “killing their babies.” Again, it is anecdotal evidence, but what if this evidence is true? Is the pain of knowing you gave up your baby for adoption greater or lesser than the pain of knowing you killed your baby? (Provided “you” only choose post-abortion syndrome vs. post-adoption.)
I know I am playing my game by my rules, but please give your honest answers to those questions. And if you wish, give me questions within similarly tight parameters and I’ll do my best to answer them.
As far as your first lines, I strongly object to the term “fair” used in conjunction with any life event. My own life has been anything but “fair.” My daughter’s life has been anything but “fair.” My siblings’ lives, my mother’s life, my grandmother’s life have been anything but “fair.” I don’t know of many people who can claim their lives were “fair.”
There are more than three women who had to raise a child without a man present. There are millions of people who had to grow up in unstable environments, and not all a result of decisions made by their parents.
The real question here is: Do you “act selfishly” as my daughter called it, or do you act with the interest of the child in mind?
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foxfier said
I’m afraid your science quote is quite wrong– at eighteen weeks the nervous system is there and functional, though still growing, and the brain is already specializing into sections for the various senses.
There was one highly contested study in ’05 that claimed that even though all the equipment was there and many experts have seen pain reflexes at twenty weeks, somehow they didn’t “really” feel pain, but even Dr. Rosen now says that the range is “somewhere” between 23 and 28– a rather extreme admission.
Twenty-eight weeks is seven weeks older than the youngest known, living premie. Her name is Amillia Taylor. Caregiver study of premies is part of why they know that kids feel pain before week 28.
As tempting as it is, we can’t morally kill someone because they don’t show much signs of personality; much less temptingly, we can’t kill someone because we think they’d have an “unstable” life (like most young adults these days? No fun being unemployed and not sure when the rent is coming).
Frankly, I don’t understand how killing your child is better than giving them up for adoption. It would be horrible to lose a child you dearly, deeply wanted, but some comfort to know they were alive and being cared for– to know your child isn’t with you, and that it’s because you paid someone to chop them up and dispose of the body, would be far worse.
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Common Sense Political Thought » Blog Archive » The “Pill”: It Kills? said
[…] as can be seen in several articles I’ve written. I am Pro-Life enough that I don’t want innocent babies to be punished for crimes worthless trash committed. And my Pro-Life stance is sincere enough that […]
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